How to Resolve Relationship Problems
Relationships do go through tough times. There are two of you and you’re different. Sometimes what you want, what you believe, how you act or what you choose will mean you clash.
For some couples the strife will be over issues like sex, money, children, fidelity or time. For others it will be the style of communication, or miscommunication, that will erode goodwill. Sometimes a specific event like a death, an illness or a redundancy stresses a relationship. It can also be actions like violence, or having an affair that bring things to crisis.
Some relationships recover and some don’t. If your relationship is in strife you might find some of these links useful.
Here is a checklist showing what to expect when your relationship is in good health and some patterns you are likely to find if your relationship is in trouble.http://www.relationships.org.nz/relationship-checklist/Stress, the relationship killer
Stress can have a very corrosive effect on a relationship. This article describes some strategies you might use if stress is getting in the way in your relationship. Find out more about turning towards each other and using a Love Jar.http://www.relationships.org.nz/stress-the-relationship-killer/
Listening with your heart
It’s remarkable what a difference really listening can make. Here are some ideas about how to listen well.
When your partner’s behaviour concerns you
Sometimes your partner’s behaviour has a significant downside for you. It can be hard to work out when to draw the line and when to keep on working at the relationship. Its especially difficult if your partner’s actions are controlling or violent. Here are some steps to help you think your situation through. If you feel unsure of the best course of action, you might want to seek some professional help to work out your options.
Lots of things can make having an affair more likely. What ever the cause is, the fallout can do tremendous damage. How a relationship might recover is a big question. Here are some steps that might help.
Loyalty and Lust
Staying faithful is one of the biggest tests in many relationships. You might be startled or disturbed if you find yourself tempted to stray. After an affair many people are left wondering why they did it. What was it that seemed so compelling? Whether you see yourself as a stayer or a strayer, if living with loyalty is a challenge to you, here are some thoughts.
Forgive Me, Forgive Me Not
Healing the breech of trust created by an affair is no mean feat. How do you go about putting the pieces back together? How do you convince your partner that you really are sorry? What do you do when your desire to forgive is at war with your fear of being outrageously foolish?
Does commitment offer you security or suffocation? Maybe you’re at odds with your partner about how you see your future together and what you owe each other. Here are some ideas about finding a balance between freedom and commitment in your relationship.
Warning ! Relationship in Trouble
So you know there is an issue in your relationship, but how serious is it ? What is it that will tell you when to pay attention to a gripe and when you can afford to ignore it ? Researchers can tell you it’s not what you disagree about, it’s how you do your disagreeing that counts
Conflict is not a bad thing in a relationship. It’s normal. It’s healthy. You just want to be sure that it’s you and your partner that are in charge of the conflict rather than the conflict jerking your chain
Having kids is one of those all-or-nothing, no half-measure issues. Compromise isn’t an option. So what do you do when you and your partner disagree ?